And now, for your weekly dose of positivity: our fave Cuse classmates if they were dogs. 

Whitman Kids: Poodles

No matter the time of day, these dogs are always looking fresh, just like the Whitman kids in their *mandatory* business casual (bitch, just admit you like wearing suits.) They’re intelligent, put-together, and always on the go — but they don’t need you to tell them that. They know they’re fancy and are proud of it. The rest of us just have to accept that they’ll always show us up.  

Kids Who Live at Bird: Border Collies 

They’re tenacious, they’re one of the smartest breeds, and they really need another espresso right this minute GODDAMNIT. These are the kids we all aspire to be, but are also a little intimidated by because they can be a little intense. They’re always working and they love being busy, but even a border collie needs a break every now and then…  

Freshmen Who Still Look Like They’re in Middle School: Chihuahuas  

Small and yippy — two qualities every college kid hopes to avoid once they get out of high school. Yet, every year a few people get to college with the same high-pitched voices and small builds, annoying the shit out of everyone else at their 8am classes. But, we have to admit that their never-ending energy is enviable, they might just need to consider keeping it to themselves every now and then.   

Has a Tab at DJs: Bichon Frises

“EXCUSE MEEE, CAN I GET ANOTHER VRB?” We’ve all heard them, we’ve all seen them, and we can all agree that nothing screams drunk-bitch-at-the-bar quite like a bichon. They play hard, but they’re also known for being a little dramatic, the type of person that really opens up after a pitcher or three. But we all know they’re fuckin adorable.  

Daily Orange Reporters: Hound Dogs

Their reporters definitely have a talent for digging around and hunting things down. Every story, every detail, every embarrassing picture, they’re THERE and they are relentless. Catch them crouching low to the ground to get just the right angle or sniffing out the details of a story with their notepad in hand.  

Basketball Team: Great Danes

Yes, they can be a little intimidating at first glance, but they’re some of the most devoted and confident dogs around. They’re spirited and dependable (LET’S GO CUSE) and they’re also known for their energy and rambunctiousness (re: sweet sixteen baby)!!  

Newhouse Kids: Pekingese 

They’ve got HIGH self esteems and a LOT of opinions, but they’re good-natured at heart and always hard at work. They’re independent, intelligent, and known for their adaptability, earning them awards at dog-shows and giving them plenty of opportunities to show off their skills… which, let’s face it, is their favorite thing to do.  

Stoners: Komondors 

I mean… just look at them… 

Chandler Plante is a freshman magazine major from Tucson, Arizona, who hasn’t owned a coat in over four years. In her spare time, she enjoys checking up on her Webkinz from 2008 and trying to convince people to read her long-winded rants and ramblings. Help a gal out and just read her articles instead.

post a comment