Hot Tub Sex Myths

Photo credit: Matthew Coughlin, Flickr.com

By Kelsie Testa

H2Orgasm? Not so much…

I heard hot tub sex can be really sexy. Thoughts?

Hot tub sex, in my experience, sucks more than fucking in the back seat of a tiny sedan. If you think it’s going to be a magical, aquatic experience, let me debunk two common myths for you.

Water washes away semen so you don’t have to wear a condom.

Sperm can still swim into your cooch to create babies. Just because you’re in a body of water doesn’t mean the sperm will get confused and think the liquid-y mass around them is a giant vagina. So bottom line: wrap it.

Warmer environments also lead to an abundance of live bacteria, so wearing a condom keeps it all in the tub and out of your hoo-ha.

The heat kills sperm.

Heat only slightly decreases sperm count, leaving between 200 and 500 million little swimmers just waiting to dive into your cave of wonders.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-l4fzCYKl2w

If you’re still not convinced that humping in the hot tub is a bad idea, remember this: water washes away your natural lubrication, so fucking in the Jacuzzi leads to more friction (than, say, if you did it on a bed or in the Student Association office).

Still looking for a good time that’s wet and wild? Have your man throw you up against the stall and get down in the shower. Just make sure he’s standing on a bathmat with good grip. Concussions tend to kill the mood.

More questions? Send your sexual conundrums to sex@jerkmagazine.net.

4 Comments on Hot Tub Sex Myths

  1. Hot tub sex seems like it’ll be totally hot like it is in the movies, but it’s really just leads to a clumsy and disappointing experience. Basically, don’t try to get it in inside the hot tub.

  2. I mean I guess it would be hot… and wet… but yeah, doesn’t sound too ideal.

  3. I had sex with my BF in the hot tub the other night while it was raining. It was HOT. We used a silicone-based lube to keep it slick, and it was seriously one of the best sexual experiences of my adult life. But it was HIS hot tub. I would do this in a public situation where you dont know what germies are swimming around.

  4. Well, my wife and I just had mind blowing sex in a hot tub. Her natural lube was MORE than enough. In fact, the creative solutions of her lower body floating with me standing were…ummm…well…mind blowing…

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